So I haven't blogged in a long time.
I've been meaning to write about my awesome Asia trip at the end of last year, but just been so busy this year I haven't found the time.
Lately though some shit has been going on in my life and I guess I just need an outlet to rant about it.
Those of you who have me on Twitter have unfortunately witnessed my series of angry and emo tweets for the past few weeks, and a few people seem to be really curious about what's going on (since you know Twitter is all cryptic and shit) so here goes lol
So I moved to Hamilton at the end of January.
I knew it wasn't gonna be easy; moving away from my family, friends, boyfriend to a tiny little rural town (in my opinion lol) where its central city is about a quarter of the size of Auckland's.
But hey, I was somewhat mentally prepared, and at least I had my adorable puppy to keep me company. The first week was really hard; I remember crying at night cause I just felt so lonely. I had just gotten my puppy as well, and she wasn't trained at all, so she was constantly biting and yapping, and pooping everywhere. And work was a completely new and strange environment for me; there was no one my age since the other grads hadn't started yet, and everyone in my team was my parent's age. And I had no idea what I was doing; everyday felt like a massively steep learning curve. I had nobody to have lunch with, and being a person who has been used to sleeping at 4 and waking at noon for the past 5 years, it was hard for me to settle into the 9-5 daily routine.
But things got better. I was learning new things everyday, I had a great manager who really wanted to help me grow and develop; taking me to all her weekly and monthly meetings and conferences. And the other grads started, and I found people to have lunch with! So work is actually the only good thing in my life right now. I surprisingly really enjoy what I'm doing, since my role for this rotation isn't very accounting based; it's more so to do with performance analysis and reporting. And I've been given new projects every week to work on, so I'm never doing the same thing everyday.
So what has been making me so miserable?
Well apart from living in shitty Hamilton, and having to drive back to Auckland every weekend (which is a pain), I had new flatmates move in 2 weeks ago. Initially, it was only me and this other girl who works at Fonterra too. She's really awesome, and it was really nice living with her, because we just respected each other, and she wasn't overly ocd about being clean, but also wasn't a lazy and messy person. But 2 weeks ago, these 2 18-year old Chinese girls moved in. I didn't like one of the girls as soon as I met her. She was loud and rude, and lazy and messy. She talked (or more like screamed) on the phone everyday for hours, and she was really fat (lol) and every time I saw her, she would constantly be eating and leaving her food scraps everywhere in the dining room and kitchen. And every time she took a shower, the bathroom floor would be soaking wet, and dirty. But that was ok. I am quite a tolerant person, and even though 4 girls sharing a bathroom sucked big time it was still ok. It was still bearable.
But last week, the girls left a huge rubbish bag (well actually MY rubbish bag that I bought but hadn't used yet since I was in Auckland for work that week), open with rotten meat, or whatever shit that it was. I had already told them last week that rubbish day was on Wednesday, but they didn't take it out, so at first, it attracted a huge amount of flies. Like I have never seen that many flies in my life. I talked to my other flatmate about it, but before we could even do anything, on Friday morning, we got greeted by about a hundred maggots down our corridor in the morning. I actually have a photo of it on my phone, but it's probably too disgusting to post on here; I don't want to contaminate my lovely blog lol. Anyways, that morning the two other girls told us that they had packed all their things and were moving out, and me and the other Sarah were late for work, so we couldn't do anything about it. When we got to work, I called the landlord lady to tell her what was going on, but the two other girls had called her already. And what fucking pissed me off was that they told her that MY DOG had brought in the maggots. Like what the fuck; at least own up to your own fucking mess. So I told the landlord lady what had really happened, and so she said she was gonna call them back to tell them to clean it up, and then just move out.
An hour later, Sarah called me and told me that the fat girl had texted her saying that the landlord lady told her not to do anything, and that WE had to clean everything up. And by then, I was so fucking angry cause I knew they were lying. I called the landlord back, and sure enough, she had said no such thing, but by then it was too late cause they had already moved out.
So me & Sarah had to go home and clean up THEIR fucking mess; we went and bought heaps of bug bombs, and spray, and then vacuumed the whole house. It was so disgusting cause the rubbish bin was maggot infested, so we had to clean that too.
Honestly, I can't believe people like that even exist in this world. It makes me so angry. But at least they moved out right.. I thought it would be the end of this horrible week.
I came home on Sunday night, feeling happy and peaceful, and ready for a new week.
And just when I thought my bad luck streak was over, yesterday night, my puppy got really sick and started vomiting. At first I thought she probably ate something bad, but then she kept vomiting, and her stomach was making these gurgling noises, so I got worried and took her to the emergency after-hours vet clinic. The vet was concerned that she might have Parvo, which is a life-threatening illness that affects dogs, so she did the test for it, but it came back negative. However, she said that sometimes even when the tests are negative, it could still be brewing underneath. And then she did an x-ray to see if she had eaten something and it got stuck, but the x-rays came back all fine. But she said she could see that the stomach lining was really thick, which may be an indication of early signs of Parvo. At this point, she said that there was a 50% chance Bubbi had Parvo, and when I heard this, I thought I was gonna die. I really felt like I couldn't cope with all of this anymore.
The consultation fee was $200 alone, and the total bill came to $600 which included the x-rays, Parvo test, and some meds which the vet gave her to calm the stomach, and stop the vomiting, as well as some electrolytes to keep her hydrated. What pissed me off was that my one-month free pet insurance had just expired, and I was in the process of getting it renewed at my vet. So yeap.. the $600 unfortunately wouldn't be covered lol.. surprise surprise.
Luckily though, Bubbi is alot better now. She's stopped vomiting, and doesn't have any signs of diaarhoea or lethargy or lack of appetite (which are symptoms of Parvo) so hopefully she will be okay. That's the most important thing I guess.
But I'm scared now. Scared that bad things will keep happening to me.
I know I only listed a few things in this blog. But actually there are some other big things that are going on in my life that I would rather not discuss publicly here.
I just feel like life is really testing me this year. I keep telling myself that what doesn't kill you only makes you stronger. If I can make it through these 6 months, then I will be a stronger and better person! But it's hard cause it feels like I'm going through all of this alone; I don't have my parents or boyfriend or anyone to lean on. Like the whole maggots thing probably won't be a big deal to some people; but I'm absolutely terrified of bugs. If I even see a moth in my room, I will scream and run out of my room, and usually get my dad or bf to kill it before I can even go back inside. So when I saw all those maggots, I cried and cried and cried, but then I realized nobody's here to take care of this, I have to be a big girl and do it myself.
Hopefully things will get better soon.
One thing I've learnt so far is that you really have to appreciate the small things in life. I know it sounds stupid and cliche, but I miss Auckland so much. I used to hate on Auckland all the time, and say that it's so shit, and can't compare to Melbourne etc, but now that I'm stuck here, my weekends in Auckland feel so precious every week. Home-cooked food, my nice warm shower at home, time with the bf, having lunch/dinner with my friends all feel so precious. And I really really miss uni; kinda feels like those good years of my life are gone forever.
Haha okay this is getting too depressing. I need to stay positive!
Hopefully next time I blog, it will be a happy one! :)
